I’m a grandmother! Actually, I’ve been a grandmother for two decades since Ashley just turned 20 and is recently married. Kayla is 12 so I’ve been practicing grandparenting for a while. But since three-year-old Daniel blew into town, my grandmother flower has bloomed!
I had two wonderful grandmothers myself to serve as examples. Grandmother was the textbook definition of a perfect grandmother. She was an old-fashioned grandmother who told stories, let me sit in her lap while she sewed, got down on the floor and played Go Fish! with my cousins and me, made clothes for me and my doll, and loved me. I was the first of her six grandchildren and the only girl, so I was special. But Grandmother made all of us seem special. She lived eight tortuous hours from Fort Worth so I only saw her a couple of times a year.
Gammy was very different from Grandmother. She lived in Fort Worth, also, so I saw her all the time. I was her only grandchild and she spoiled me. She took me to her bridge parties where I sat in a corner, ostensibly reading a book, but watching all the ladies. She picked me up from junior high on those “embarrassing days.” She drove a white Thunderbird in which I took my driver’s test. After my grandfather died, I spent Friday nights with her. We went to movies and ate on trays in front of the television. She was always there. As I grew older, it made me tired. I didn’t know it then, but she was also the perfect grandmother.
I’m somewhat of a mix of the two. At first I thought only to strive for the example set by Grandmother. I adored her. I bake cookies, play games, snuggle in the big chair, knit caps and indulge at the grocery store. I play checkers and Parcheesi. However, I drive a red convertible Mustang, sing with the radio and watch the Twilight movies. I know Justin Bieber. I show up at parades, ball games, band concerts. Kayla spends many weekends with me. I’m always there. If Kayla spits in a pond, I’m going to be there to see it!
I didn’t think I’d ever get to know Daniel since he lived in Florida. However, circumstances brought his family back to Beaumont. Daniel is autistic. He doesn’t talk, but his non-verbal skills are sharp. He lets me know what he does and doesn’t want. He spent a month with me every day before he started school. At first, it was all “Grandmother” for me. We played with trucks and blocks and I sat in the little chairs. (oof). I served lunch on the Mickey Mouse plate and tried to get him to eat. (ugh). I tried to read books and play puzzles. (aargh). Then Daniel started school and “Gammy” kicked in. I pick him up from school every afternoon in the red Mustang. He knows me and the red car. He climbs in the car seat himself now. I sing “The Wheels on the Bus” and “Rawhide” (rollin’, rollin’, keep them doggies rollin’). We go home and watch Special Agent Oso and Little Einsteins. I watch him play with trucks and climb on the furniture. He gives me “high five” for cookies, one for each hand. He runs around the house and I chase him. We have a ball.
I’m finding my own place now. Part “Grandmother,” part “Gammy” and mostly me with a little dash of the comic strip "Lola." Since I retired, “I have time.” I spend a large part of it going from one grandchild to another. Sometimes, I meet myself coming and going, but I’m trying to carry on the mission and keep the memories alive.
I’ve worn many hats in my life thus far. This one fits the best!
